colin

i had a dream last night
WHEW
crazy nightmare
many issues
first -
Laura called me
from Sunny Beach
a tropical place, she explained
and reasoned that I should already know that
since she lived in Virginia with all of you
she called me to ask me
so how long have you been pregnant?
she had sensed it over the many miles because of a change in the wind
then i discovered that Killy knew i was pregnant too
but that I didn't know
so i pretended i knew
and laughed insincerely that I knew for weeks already
THEN
later that day
I got fired from my waitressing job
because of gossiping
and as I was ready to go home
a really nice asian guy
one of those ultra hip super souped car jag guys
parked ON TOP of my little car
squashing it into the shape of a box
i cried from having lost the job
and felt bad for making the nice asian guy fell bad
so i took my baby to a petting zoo
which was the best petting zoo in the world
because it had a whole slew of llamas to pet
and a big yard full of kissing cows
yep - that's right - cows that, instead of mooing
made BIG WET kissing sounds
so loud that sometimes it came out sounding like a high pitched squeak
and then - these cows looked like something that dr. Seuss would draw
anyway
the baby and i went through the zoo and ended up at my old bosses house
(Don was the baby's second godfather)
where we ran into quickly upon seeing a six foot rabbit in the back yard
who really wanted to get into the moon
so my boss shares a trick from the 60s with us
this time, it was barbara ann and the baby and me
hanging out at Don's house
he showed us how to take essential oils
and rub them on our gums
for a REALLY stunning, natural high with no side effects
(except for a dry mouth)
and it was good for the baby too!
SO
there we were when all of a sudden
the cops busted in and arrested Don and Adolph
(I don't know how Adolph got in there)
for being Hector Molesters
hmmmm
so barbara was confused and argued
ineffectively
to release don and adolph
but the cops wouldn't have any of it
i finally got her to stop talking as i saw that this was just working against us
and i let the cops do their thing
but just before they left
i pleaded to their common sense
which i realized they totally lacked when they insisted on arresting don and adolph
and they took them away
and barbara ann, the baby and i were left in don's house
afraid to go outside because of the six foot rabbit
who kept looking at the moon

then i woke up